Lies & Bullshit

We all do it!

However, the number one thing that drives men crazy are the fake phone numbers or contact info. Come on now, really?

People, it is almost the year 2010, and women are pulling out these 1972 moves?

Ladies, just say no, or tell us that you don't like our hair styles, bad breath, or our bus passes, or quite possibly the fact that we are too short or that our penis maybe too small based on our hand size.

But please, for the love of Moses...don't hit us with the fake cell, email or BBM pin. I mean, really?

If that's the case then why not pick up a few business cards in the fish bowl at the local after-work happy hour spot, in the lobby of that high raise building you work near, and hand them out to every guy you don't want to give your number to, rather than give out fake contact info.

Don't get me wrong, the guy in the night club just lied his ass off in order to get your number. He probably told you that he's a race car driver, or that he's tight with Spiderman, or he's a big Hollywood agent, he directs porn, or that he's Brad Pitts personal assistant, etc.

Cool, we all get it.

Whatever the case maybe for guys, the end result is that he's looking to get laid by the end of the conversation, or by the end of the night. Because rubbing one or two out (aka, spanking the money), gets kinda dull and lack luster.

For most women, the point is to find a so-called normal guy, a boyfriend, and/or husband...however, girls want to put you on that friend list, until they feel a high level of comfort....then they'll be open to having you give them a little backdoor action.

The point is that it all comes down to sex.

Think about it, guys will pay crazy amounts of money on bottle service (which they know they can buy the same bottles at Costco for $12 dollars...instead of $400 a bottle at the nightclub)....all in an effort to get girls drunk and show everyone that they are ballers....however if it doesn't work, then they'll be at home playing with their balls.

So ladies, please remember that dishing out the fake info is kinda wack.

Just say that you are married to a prisoner who was convicted of murder in the second degree and he's coming home in a few days. Trust me, no one is going to want your telephone number, but make no mistakes about, if you are a hot girl, then guys will be guys, and will want to "hit that" asap (doesn't matter if you have a man locked up or not).

Guys and gals....just keep it real.

Guys, just be direct without trying to sound like a jack ass.
EXAMPLE: "Listen, I enjoyed talking to you, how about we finish this conversation over a nice bottle of champagne at my house in the hills tonight? The view is unreal."

Ladies, just hit'em with the truth.
Example: "Hey, I really like your style but I just got out of a long relationship and I don't want to make the same mistake twice. I lost my cellphone yesterday, can you write down your number and I'll call you later?"

Everyone walks away feeling like a winner....without losing their self respect.